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My Robot Is Pregnant theme song!

tough guy poetry and manly stories of loneliness
all contents copyright Jon Rolston 2004, 2005, 2006

April 19, 2010

coin shooter’s delight

Fresh turned earth. If all goes well, tonite I’ll do some treasure hunting with the metal detector in the torn up football field at the high school across the street.

April 18, 2010


The local market has loose apples piled up according type, and then on the top shelf these four packs in plastic are arranged. Why do we need apples in plastic to go boxes? So they look more like junk food most likely. Further inspection reveals these apples have been infused with natural and artificial grape flavor so they allegedly taste like a giant redskinned crunchy grape.

This is the type of thing Doug would buy and not tell you what you’re about to eat. go to the website if you’re bored and catch a glimpse of the future of food. www.grapplefruits.com

This garage sale shows evidence of a collecting problem. People just stood at the door overwhelmed by the choice.

city sidewalks pretty sidewalks

photo posted from my iPhone

Two gallons of epoxy later the sidewalk grate is sealed up. Rain this week is the test.

April 16, 2010

to catch a tagger

There was a parking spot in front of Sophias window – it rarely happens. i spent a few hours in the window waiting to catch a tagger. At some point I laid down on the carpet hoping I’d hear the taggers. Then a few hours later Sophia made me wake up and get in bed.

April 14, 2010

photo posted from my iPhone

This is a mummified mouse carcass set in an old pie tin filled with wall plaster. A chunk of driftwood set in before hardening as well. A first attempt at using spackling as an art medium. Needs some work.

April 13, 2010

dish detergent bottle

photo posted from my iPhone

Found this in a clean out today. Can’t say I hated to see it go.

my bible stands about this tall


Let’s have a caption contest like they do at the back of the New Yorker.

For instance:

“Hi, sorry to bother you, but could you turn down your music?”

“Have you seen two Mormon boys recently?”

“Sorry, I couldn’t find a doorbell.”

April 12, 2010


April 11, 2010

It might have been teamwork, but it was MY teamwork. All mine.

April 10, 2010

in the mission

April 8, 2010

bank of ian

“I’ll leave three hundred dollars under the mat for you,” he tells me.

not as strong as kilz

Try getting funding today for a chemical product with that name.

You can’t believe everything you read on a laminated menu, but it says this restaurant in San Francisco invented the sushi boat delivery system in 1982.

Humans are mimics, that’s how most of us learn and thus survive. How can we mimic the success of sushi boat? Perhaps a dirt track with small trucks pulling wagons loaded with hamburgers? Perhaps sliders, those mini burgers, would be best.

Humans entertain themselves by putting things where they don’t belong. What could we bring to sushi boat that would entertain us? Rig a water skier behind a boat? Drop an RC shark in the water? Or a small version of the Sea Shepard that tries to block people from taking a sushi plate off the boat. What if, for a senior project, a student of architecture created a scale model of a waste water treatment plant and we pumped sewerage into the sushi boat river?

April 6, 2010

You’re looking up from the basement through a grate in the sidewalk. Today’s challenge was to cover it up so rain doesn’t flood in. If the process proves interesting you’ll be updated. If it turns out to be stuffing a bunch of cement in it, who cares?

Next thing. Looking at the stereo section of an early 1970’s mail order catalogue makes you realize simulated wood grain had it’s heyday. The lesson to be learned? We are slow to accept change. Instead of letting radios be crazy colors and shapes, they used it like wood. Little brown boxes for alarm clocks and big brown boxes for the tv.

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