meet big jim
Big Jim is the only white guy on his block over in West Oakland – not a great part of town. He’s a bit of an anomaly in many aspects. He carries a knife and walks everywhere he goes. No tools and no vehicle, but he knows how to do everything and moves fast so he never worries for work. We can’t say he is in the normal nine to five work world. Turns out he’d never eaten a Whopper, so the guys on the crew chipped in and bought him a Double Whopper with cheese yesterday.
My Robot Is Pregnant: What have you heard about the Whopper that got you ready for this experience?
Big Jim: It’s flame broiled. Grill taste. Actually I don’t like Whoppers. It was heavy. I’ve had a Whopper Junior before. Whopper Jr tastes totally different.
MRIP: What? We all thought you’d never eaten at the King before!
Big Jim: That blows that whole deal.
MRIP: Well, tell us about it anyway.
Big Jim: Nothing there…something to eat. It filled me up. No magic there. Nope. No magic there.
MRIP: Think back on it and describe the experience.
Big Jim. I wish I hadn’t eaten it. I was thinking as I was eating it ‘I gotta get that cook stove.’
MRIP: What cook stove?
Big Jim: I gotta get the gas turned back on at the house.
MRIP: How long’s it been off?
Big Jim: 3 or 4 months.
MRIP: Why?
Big Jim: I’m trying to get Quanette out of the house. But she’s getting used to the cold so I might as well turn it back on.
MRIP: Or smash out the windows so it gets really bad. What would you rather have eaten besides that Whopper?
Big Jim: Some pasta with olive oil.
MRIP: How many people in America do you think have never tasted a Whopper?
Big Jim: It’s like how many vegans are out there? I don’t know. Probably a million people’ve never had a Whopper.
MRIP: Why did it take you so long?
Big Jim: I had better things to eat. Or I’d get chicken if I went there.