I brought Doug along as a character witness to my police commission hearing. You know, I’m getting my permit to be a junk gatherer in San Francisco.
“What do I say,” Doug asked me.
“Start every sentence with, ‘My Dad’s a judge in Alameda’, no matter how irrelevant it is. Things’ll be fine.”
Well, Doug never got his chance at the mic. The zoning board denied me on grounds that my home address, which was required on forms so they could mail me my permit, is not zoned for a junk gathering operation. Of course this was dealt with already at the Police Department where it was written out that I wouldn’t be using my residence to store any objects. It’s only a mailing address. But the Police commission can’t override the zoning board so I have to have another hearing on the 30th. In the meantime I have to convince the zoning board I won’t be running a recycling factory out of my bedroom.
So, they risk their lives and save our asses. But what’s the price tag? If they have a couple extra ladder trucks laying around to fly flags with, how much does that cost? Or, if those aren’t extra, how long does it take to get that thing down if my house starts burning? Remember, a flag can’t touch the ground or you have to burn it. And burning that thing requires a pretty huge fireplace. And what’s a three story flag cost anyway? The street was lined with cop cars, are we paying officers overtime to attend a funeral? Or are they off duty? And if off duty, are they allowed to borrow cruisers? Again, they risk their lives. And they have a strong union that gets them pay raises while Sean’s daughters art and music classes are cut out of the budget. Would a dead hero trade a giant flag for the next generation’s education?
three blocks away at my grocery store a woman smashed $9000 dollars worth of booze . That’s the estimate I heard, not yet confirmed. Nick and I ran down with sponges and got at least thirty dollars of it squeezed into a bucket.
The blocks all look the same out here in the Richmond, which makes it hard to imagine what’s going on inside. I’ve been doing work for this woman for a bit, and one of these days she is going to put on make up and let me interview her.
She doesn’t put on makeup much any more. She’s 77 and used to love to look at herself. Her bedroom walls are completely mirrored.
“Now I close my eyes,” she says.
Apple announced the new iPhone is coming out with the 5 megapixel camera I asked for and a video camera as well. I can’t help but think of all the awesome this blog is gonna become when I get one.
photo posted from my iPhone
Chiraag in a welding helmet riding a 1987 Honda Spree. You wanna bbq with me? You better come prepared.
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So if you’re living in Venice and you buy a new couch, what do you do with the old one that’s still in good condition? You can’t really put it on the street, or it will sink and that would be littering and it wouldn’t take too many people throwing old couches in the water on the corner before you couldn’t even row your boat to the market with out running aground on soggy furniture.
Molly, who’s been there, may have some insight. Is there a recycling service in Venice? How does garbage collection work?
Lucas had me come over and help out with the garage. It’s our third trip in there, just so much junk his Grampa accumulated, and then the dust and leaves and feral cat shit that built up over the years after the door broke and no one ever went in.
The highlight find was rolled up posters in an old locker. Psychedelic love posters and black light Peace posters, an original Easy Rider poster, just an awesome time capsule into Lucas’ dad’s youth. Another highlight was Lucas’ story about Edward 40 hands. He was told, and thought it was retarded, that people get together and duct tape a 40 ounce malt liquor bottle in each hand and can’t take them off till they’re both gone.
That was a good laugh, imagining the idiot kid having to piss his pants an hour into it because he can’t unzip his fly. Or getting drunk and stumbling, only to shatter cheap Olde English glass deep into his palms as he reaches out instinctually to balance himself. Why not have some sanity and play Edward 24 hands people?
I wonder if Lyle has read the Arizona law about illegal immigrants. I haven’t. Wouldn’t it be easy to find illegal immigrants in industries they normally work? Like restaurants? If a health inspector can show up and go through your refrigerator, or the fire inspector can tell you need to move your furniture around, why can’t INS come in and check the status of employee’s citizenship? Anytime the police are asked to do something that doesn’t involve solving crimes, it seems like a threat to our security. Oh wait, I guess being illegal is a crime. But it’s like when a cop stops you for jaywalking. It makes that cop look lazy. Why aren’t they searching for killers and rapists?
If French Canadians were swarming our northern border and causing problems, New Hampshire just might pass a law that tried to deal with it. It might target people with a French Canadian accent. However, we should have enough laws in effect that should prevent French Canadians from getting jobs, getting on Medicare, getting licenses to drive. If they can’t get in the system they won’t be in the country for long. Anyone wanna explain this to me?
Venice. How do they collect their garbage? It’s a dream of mine to be the junk man of Venice, rowing down the streets, collecting junk, hauling garbage, moving furniture in my little gondola.
The dentist asked me to start flossing and stop grinding my teeth at night. Used to be cavities were all they worried about. There’s always room for improvement Nikki told me. “People want to see you happy, why do you serve them pain?” That came from the love poems of Rumi, a book found in a sidewalk free pile.
Let’s take that as a warning to ourselves. Are we serving our pain out to people? Knock it it off then. That pick up is practically broke in two but it’s still on the road. It’s only bad when they haul you to the scrap yard.
