My Robot Is Pregnant theme song!

What are we gonna do with all these old donuts? Honeyglazed get all sweaty and ruined after just five hours. A plain donut gets an interesting crust by the next morning, but day three – forget it. By the time mountain dew was canned, it was no longer naturally refreshing. Some things are meant to be enjoyed immediately, such as donuts and cocaine. You don’t buy Sunday’s donuts on Thursday and you don’t buy coke “for later”.

So we got all these old donuts. We could recycle them. Soak them in tubs of water and strain off the sugar. Has anyone looked into dehydrating donuts for camping trips? Make Magazine might look for a repurposing project from its readers. I was thinking they’d make good insulation, but then there’s the rat and ant issue that would create.

Bait for lobster traps? Do crabs have a sweet tooth? Would horses be amenable to French crullers in lieu of sugar cubes? Is there a choking hazard I’m not aware of? Are the donut shops just too far from the ranches to justify the program?

There are some big problems we need to tackle in the new year. This one is probably on a different list. It’s probably on a “small problems” list. Or a “never considered it a problem but now that you mention it I guess we’ll have to write it down” list alongside “why are the handles on these coffee mugs so little”?