My Robot Is Pregnant theme song!

it was ladies night in the richmond and we sat at the table and cut up old pieces of paper to make new images and we talked about life. sorry you missed it.

They push their carts down the street, right in the street. It doesn’t matter. There’s more money in lawsuits than aluminum cans. But if they don’t get hit they still have enough for a room and a bottle at the end of the day.

Locke and I were working on Sally’s manure bin. It got crowded when Rus tried to back the cement truck in there. This is a ridiculous attempt at innuendo. Anyone else want to make a joke about building a manure bin?

She was wearing a strapless dress and said she felt like a slut because of it. I was trying to decide whether I’d have another and find out or just finish this one and go. There was enough in the glass for one more awkward pause before it’d be empty. I had to make up my mind.

“I’ve never wanted to be an actor, but I always wanted to be a re-en-actor. Like people who work at colonial villages and churn butter for tourists,” she said.

It was a little after seven pm. If I had another I wouldn’t be able to stop. I’d be drinking straight on till I passed out.

“But I’d do crime shows on tv too. Re-en-act the woman who gets tied up and raped on America’s Most Wanted. That’d be fun.”

She was sitting on my left at the bar. She was moving ice cubes with the little red straw from her drink. I had the pint glass in my hand with one edge of it on the bar and I was making the last swallow jiggle at the bottom. We both looked straight ahead and slightly down at the rows of booze behind the counter. Strange brands. I guess it was well stuff. I’d never seen the labels or heard the names before in my life. I began to suspect an Asian man owned the bar. Or a Mexican. Someone with ties to another country. Where things were different.

“I think those roles would be easier for me. You gonna have another drink?” She asked.

Of course I was. I don’t know why I tell myself I’ll just have one. That’s not how it works around here.

It was a rather psychedelic experience using the Neti pot for the first time. It’s warm water and salt solution poured up one nostril that then drains out the other. You can see the stream coming out my nose in the photo. I heard Hindus do it and it gets you high.

saw this taped outside the bank this afternoon. it’s kinda like the echo park thing i wrote, based on a crazy person’s announcement taped to a park bench in LA.

I had a vegan donut the other day. It will never give me the memories of a plain donut with a little sugar sprinkled on top, but it felt good to eat. They are from peoples donuts in Berkeley.

That’s the name of the store. Drink Liquor. Did the proprietor take a small business owners class offered at The Learning Annex? It’s brilliant. I played with the image in Photoshop. People like to tell you what filter they ran it through. But I won’t.

still from the German film “Schultze gets the blues”. A random google image search

there’s an old folk remedy for the blues. you go buy a motorcycle and ride into the north country. stop at a gas station that serves as the focus of a whole community you’re so far out there in the brambles. this is part of the cure. take a long piss in the restroom. read everything on the walls. remember to wash your hands. the prescription calls for you to buy an ice cream sandwich. it can be one of the round ones with chocolate chip cookies for crust. or the rectangular one from the old days. nearly black outer layer soft as the ice cream. it sticks to your hands. you own a motorcycle now and you can go 85 miles an hour on the highway with your hands clamped on the handle bars like you are 12 riding a bike to your friends down a wicked big hill. this is also part of the cure. you remember telling yourself how easy it would be to die when you were three feet tall and climbing the biggest trees in the woods. and here you are again, picturing yourself falling off the bike and the car behind you driving over you. but the bike is a 750. 5 speeds. 26 years old. shaky. dangerous. when you get the blues you have to go out there and hold on for dear life. the blues get afraid. your shoulders hurt you are holding onto the bike so hard, you don’t wanna die. it’s cold. the wind is trying to push you over. you move around in your lane more than you can control. what about a pothole? a blown tire? some piece of junk that falls on the road? even if you run over something dead you’re fucked. but you don’t slow down. those blues are a bitch.

image from K’s blog male mannequin.
Spring’s coming on like a truck-stop whore back east. New England’s throwing off those coats and staying up late. Can’t blame you, it’s been awful dry indoors these last months. Open the windows and pack a bowl. Thanks New Hampshire.

This was on the 280. An old Ford truck with a set of color matched balls hanging down under the truck, right smack in the center where they should be. I was driving and couldn’t get a good picture, but boy was I impressed. They were anatomically correct what with one hanging lower than the other.

I’m researching into getting a business license here in the city and came across a government list(scroll to the bottom and open a pdf if you really care) of fees for various professions. Here’s some of the more interesting ones.

these are yearly fees.

fortune teller $46

junk dealer $506
junk gatherer (resident) $97

antique shop $60

(why do antique shops pay less than junk gatherers?)

masked ball $215 (one time fee)

outcall massage service $209

escort service employee $84
owner $481

encounter studio employee $54
owner $474
(let’s assume what type of encounters they’re talking about)

medical cannabis dispensary $3,100
with an unexplained surcharge of $109

That’s what makes this city so great. They legalize and tax the good times.

Here’s a picture from Nick Flagpole’s camera phone. When we were reading Dick Tracy in the Sunday funnies did we imagine we would send photos from a phone to a website? I don’t think so. And who could have imagined the photo featured Olivia Newton John with a marijuana beard? I guess I couldn’t because I wasn’t smoking pot yet. But Dick’s wristwatch phone sure was cool.

if any apiarist out there know why the hive would appear to swarm and then land back on the outside of the hive, let me know. Did the new queen die?