My Robot Is Pregnant theme song!

Another area I’d like to see some research done in: student crushes on teachers. Do students learn better from teachers they have crushes on? Should cuteness be a factor when hiring? Should teacher’s portraits be included in course selection catalogs?

In other news, there were some black comedians responding to Kramer’s racist verbal attack on a heckler. These comedians were talking about african americans reclaiming the word nigger. Reclaiming a word entails the people the epithet is directed at using the word themselves in a positive way. I’ve heard women say they have reclaimed the word bitch, and gays have reclaimed queer.

Here is a short list of unreclaimed words I’m considering repossessing:

gaylord

dickhead

cunt face

or even more personally,

skeleton man

bug eyes

Lurch

If I were a research scientist, I would investigate the nutritional value of phlegm. Should I be swallowing the stuff, and if I do, how many calories am I adding to my daily recommended allowance? Or, since it is already inside me, is there any net gain? If I ate my own brain, I suppose I would gain some weight…but if I ate my legs, would I lose more weight than I gained? That’s why I want to be a research scientist. I’m curious.

A brick factory in Vietnam. Near Mekong Delta.

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Sitting on a stool at the Vietnamese laquer factory.

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The Scream