My Robot Is Pregnant theme song!

tough guy poetry and manly stories of loneliness
all contents copyright Jon Rolston 2004, 2005, 2006

April 6, 2013

guns don’t kill people. bullets do.

We all know guns don’t kill people. They’ve only been designed to kill people. In many different numbers, climates, and distances. I mention it because the new guy in the truck has a lot of conservative one liners he likes to throw out.

“As a union carpenter I have to get drug tested to go to work. Why shouldn’t these leeches get drug tested to collect unemployment?”

“Well,” I say. “Perhaps because you could kill your coworkers and yourself if you show up on drugs but no one’s at risk if someone is doing drugs on their couch at home.”

“That’s an interesting liberal point,” he says.

He goes on to say it’s all about those in control trying to divide the little people. We don’t like people who sit around collecting welfare, we don’t like immigrants who want our jobs, so we don’t like people who work and we don’t like people who don’t. Then you go to jail for smoking pot.

How can we fight Congress’s bailout of banks and the refusal to bring charges against the key players? We can’t because we are too busy working to pay off overdraft charges and the 3 dollar ATM fee’s we’ve accrued.

“I’m glad we’ve got guns all over country, hillbillies and gangsters everywhere, it’s a standing army. They proved Russia wanted to attack us but we had too many guns.”

That’s the new guy talking. It’s easy to recognize his voice. We meet at 10 am this morning and head north to clean out a hoarders 2 bedroom home. My ears will be set on “Record” and I will let his stories wash over, the miles of the highway will turn into a mist as he poses a question and takes the floor to answer it, then with a small question from the audience he will take the other side and argue himself down, then dismiss the whole conversation with a phrase like, “But what do I know about good ideas? I got a four leaf clover tattooed on my neck.”

Let’s just say the new guy is my latest muse, and the reason I had to sit down and write again.

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