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tough guy poetry and manly stories of loneliness
all contents copyright Jon Rolston 2004, 2005, 2006

March 8, 2011

half’s and half not’s


It may seem like you need a pair to split, but even one can be divided.

When you multiply by half, you divide in two. Multiplying is not obligated to create more. 10 loaves of bread multiplied by 1/2 a loaf of bread is five loaves of bread. You don’t have to be Jesus to make less out of more. You have to understand multiplication’s dark side.

.5 is like saying half. Unless it’s .04 which is half way drunk. Half in the bag is .10 or more. Think of it in terms of labor. If you were to work a whole day, but worked half assed, you didn’t get a whole day’s work done. You watched some YouTube, texted friends, and created a little added value for your employer.

Ever heard of a halfie? Not quite hard, not totally soft. It’s a diminished state. If you were flaccid you wouldn’t be thinking about sex and you could get some housework done. If you were hard you’d be busy. But this halfie has you stuck, embarrassed to get out of bed, afraid to make a move.

Not all halves are bad. Every morning millions choose half and half (although that sounds like a whole) or half decaf half regular. Sometimes half throttle or half joking is just the speed a situation requires to avoid a wreck.

Half time is a chance to reflect on performance much like midlife crises are the wake up call it’s half over. These are important moments. Thanks for reading.

2 Comments

  1. http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2011/03/07/MN6K1I4BU4.DTL

    I would love to see this in 3D….

    Comment by al — March 9, 2011 @ 10:45 pm

  2. That was cool!

    Comment by Rolston — March 11, 2011 @ 11:06 am

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