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My Robot Is Pregnant theme song!

tough guy poetry and manly stories of loneliness
all contents copyright Jon Rolston 2004, 2005, 2006

September 9, 2010

rusty

Mr. Sunshine turned 75 today! Congratulations old timer.

paper rush

Found a new place that buys all kinds of paper. It’s just dreamy.

September 7, 2010

everything or less

There’s only two options when you’re desperate for cool, singing the, “I got the, I got the blues, blues.” All or nothing is another way of dying. Everything or less is the healthy start.

September 6, 2010

mmm…chicken

chicken
Here’s one idea. Stew gets drunk and pukes up his dinner. Sloan loves Thai food.

one thing leads to another

toilet
J Stew came by and so did Old MacDonald. The plan was to draw up some comics about Chompy, a hamburger that didn’t taste good and was thrown out the window. He whistles when he’s sad because he doesn’t know whistling means happiness. One day a bottle of Sweet Tea Vodka someone used as a piss jug is thrown out and lands alongside Chompy in the woods. They become friends and have adventures.

A test audience consisting of my two roommates revealed our idea to be too similar to Aqua Teen Hunger Force. So we decided to do a comic about Stew-bag’s toilet. The one he keeps throwing cigarettes into as he tries to quit. His toilet has now become addicted itself, and hangs out smoking and musing on life. His name is Sloan, like the valve company that plumbs urinals. He’s a gruff but sensitive old school toilet that uses 3 gallons a flush.
No one’s sure what comes next, but if you got any hilarious toilet situations, leave a comment below!

There’s a Greek cultural festival down by Sean’s house. Food, music, culture, and a bouncy castle for the kids. Only it’s not a castle, it’s a ruin. A bouncy ruin, like the Parthenon.

September 2, 2010

day’s work

Was an interesting day but too tired to write about it. Quickly though, the Honduran I’ve been working with, he tells me his girlfriend calls him an elbow when he doesn’t spend money. Never heard that idiom. Then he told me stories about riding box cars up through Mexico. Bandits unbolt part of the track at night and the train has sensors that alert it and the train stops. Bandits kidnap any illegal they can grab and ransom you back to your family for 6 to ten thousand dollars, depending on what country and where in that country you’re from. But if you’re lucky, they tell you to strip nude and they tear open your clothes and just steal your money.

It was me and the Honduran, Noah. We were hanging white boards in an office downtown.

September 1, 2010

whore’s medicine

It’s a nation of neurotics. Texting onstage during the karaoke instrumental. Clearing the browser cache to cover porno tracks. Smoking cigarettes in the face of overwhelming evidence it’s manufactured to cause addiction and eventual death.

Old J Stew is trying to quit.

“I went to bed and felt that tiredness in my body as it churned through the smoke. I lay there thinking, ‘This is my body trying to stay alive’. I jumped out of bed, grabbed the smokes and crumpled them and threw them in the toilet. I stood above the little camel treading water and thought, ‘That’s gonna clog my toilet.'”

Quitting has complications of course. You can’t plan for such things. Just remember it’s a whore’s medicine, something you grab as a consolation that is really just using you up.

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