My Robot Is Pregnant theme song!

tough guy poetry and manly stories of loneliness
all contents copyright Jon Rolston 2004, 2005, 2006

February 20, 2010

gung hay fat choy

fat chow

The neighbors I only say hi to because they speak Cantonese came into the garage last night and gave me a Chinese New Year bag!

have we seen this yet?


notice the black person is doing it all wrong. Be kind to the white guy! Racist!

February 19, 2010

Worked alongside Jesse Jameson the other day. “That guy there is a carob tree. Fake chocolate.” As we drove up through Mill Valley he called out which ones he recognized, and it was quite a few. Sweet shade. Plum trees in blossom. Acacia.

“I was on a three day bender,” he said. “I’d go into a bar and my body would say, ‘Really? You’re going in here?’ and I would go on in. I don’t know why. there’s no prize at the bottom of a bottle.”

So I wrote a verse about that today as I drove around the city.

There’s no prize at the bottom of the bottle,
You’re holding brown glass, hollow in your hand

Sometimes things sound better when you’re alone in your truck singing to yourself.

February 17, 2010

my mannequinn is pregnant

at the dump this afternoon someone was throwing out all these mannequinns and the bucket loader was coming to snatch them up. It’s a video game, trying to beat the hungry jaws of the machine to the prize. Have you ever seen a pregnant one before? The dump is so educational.

photo posted from my iPhone

when the going gets tough, toss the scarab beetle across china

photo posted from my iPhone

I want to thank Sean for not just telling me those words of wisdom, but for painting me an inspirational poster to accompany it. Lately the old boy’s been getting attacked by beetles from all sides. Let’s cheer him on.

February 15, 2010


photo posted from my iPhone

Headed north to Sebastapol. Stopped by Grocery Outlet in Rohnert Park. It’s a reseller of overstock food. And sometimes shoes. It’s like Building 19 in Massachusetts.

photo posted from my iPhone

Here we have three versions of fruit rings. I know Shaws is New England. Where are the others from?

February 12, 2010

fart blocker

photo posted from my iPhone

Worked late with Seano. Drank coffee and ate junk food and here’s something you might not know, I get horrible gas.

rusty’s toolshed. (one of many)

photo posted from my iPhone

February 11, 2010

photo posted from my iPhone

I used to use two trucks to jump the dual batteries in the pickup. Then I realized I could run two cables from one battery.

movie marathon

photo posted from my iPhone

February 8, 2010

sewing destruction

photo posted from my iPhone

Today we’ll be learning to demo out existing seams to make way for a remodel. The client bought this cute fixer upper from the early 1960’s (see polyester building materials and dated button hardware) and has asked for a slimmer fit.

“There’s too much unused space in the ass,” says owner Jon Rolston. “Can you make it hug more in the nuts and make the jacket look less like a sack?”

We can. The first step is to rip out the waistband, pull off belt loops at the seam junctions, and then get the outer seams blown out.

Same as when you first start dating a gal, you’ll notice it slow going around the crotch. You got three layers of fabric bound together by the heavy duty thread of the button eye.

clean air vehicle emits fungi

photo posted from my iPhone

February 7, 2010


photo posted from my iPhone

Tex is her name. She fired up the torch and went to work making jewelry while I loaded old broken shelving in the truck.

“I came here in ’52,” she told me.

I gotta set her up with Rusty Sunshine!

photo posted from my iPhone

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